Mother May I (raise my child)?

“Little Bit” is my youngest daughter and she will be 16 in July. She’s an honors and AP student in public school (she took only one AP class last year but has 3 on the schedule for next year) and is going into her junior year with a 3.71 GPA. She and I were discussing her present and future and she indicated that she would like to take some summer classes at CCCCD. That’s Collin County Community College for you guys outside of our intimacy circle.

I took “Little Bit” to register and was shocked to learn that we would have to seek permission from a PISD counselor before she could register for summer classes. I asked why- I am her parent and believe that I have ultimate permission granting rights until she is legally recognized as an adult. The admissions clerk said that as long as she is tied to a public ISD, she would have to seek their permission as well. My bitchy side came out. The conversation went pretty much as follows:

Miche: So you’re telling me that my kiddo, who is seeking to be educated, has to first seek permission from the state instead of me?

Clerk: Yes, I’m sorry. You might find a counselor at PESH to sign off, but it is summer and they may not be on campus.

Miche: Wait, my authority as parent is not enough to enrich my child’s life?

Clerk: As long as she is tied to the ISD, she must have the counselor’s signature.

Miche: So, if I allow her to drop out, get a GED, and then come back, there will be no problem?

Clerk: That’s correct, although we don’t recommend it.

To his credit, the clerk was very courteous. I was pissed (but polite) though. I’ve always hated the one size fits all approach to education that our government seems bent on forcing upon us. This idea of hunting down a summer counselor to sign off on my daughter’s elective education grated on me like you wouldn’t believe. To their credit, PISD was gracious and they even seemed to understand my issue.

It took two days, but I was able to get the signature needed. When I got back to the community college with the signed docs in hand, the clerk said, “If you were angry yesterday, you’ll be very angry today.” It seems that I needed to seek the ISD’s permission to enrich my daughter’s life, but now that the permission’s obtained, my daughter is considered an adult and college student, so I have no access to her grades. Oh, and because she is tied to the ISD, she can only take one class during the summer session.

This experience has solidified what I already knew. The state thinks they own our children and they don’t give a flying fuck about their education. If they cared, there would have been no issue about a good student seeking to enter a college course paid for by her parents. She asked no favor and required no special consideration.

I’m faced now with three options. “Little Bit” can take her one college class and start PESH in the fall, or she can get her GED and go to college now, or she can sleep until noon being babyfied because I’m too weak to allow her the decision.

OK, there are really only two choices. She can’t be sloth like under my roof, and the other two are actually up to her. “Little Bit” can take the one class and determine whether she finds it more appropriate to go back to high school or continue on the community college track to University. There are conditions to be met if she chooses the GED/college route. She must earn an “A’ average in the initial class, go to class everyday, and live in our home while respecting our rules.

She is a very intelligent young woman and knows pretty much what will be required of her to live a successful life. She knows that money doesn’t buy happiness and education doesn’t equate to good character. All in all, she is an active member in our family and while Dad is adamantly opposed to GED/community college (elitist Princeton/NYU grad that he is ;o) our family rules only require that she be a self-sufficient and good human. We will trust that we did well enough for her to decide her path.

~ by Miche on June 20, 2007.